Tuesday May 31st 6:30pm – Littleton, NH

The State of New Hampshire established a commission to study ‘same-sex marriage and all of its legal equivalents. This commission has determined that one of the ways it will gather information and a sense of what the citizens of NH want is to hold four public hearings around the state.

There will be one in Littleton at the Opera House which is on Route 302 at the intersection with Route 115. (The other hearings will be held in Portsmouth, Nashua and Keene.)

It is critically important that the supporters of same sex marriage make a positive impact on the commission members in Littleton.

Contact: Ed Butler EdoftheNotch@aol.com (603)374-6131

NHFTM Message points on Marriage Equality

The following memo includes messages and talking points on marriage equality. We have also included some questions and answers on these topics.

Message points on marriage equality

• Marriage is a commitment. It is about sharing, love, trust, and compromise. Two adults who make this private personal choice to form a life-long commitment should not be denied the right to marry just because they are gay or lesbian.

• Gay Americans serve in the military, keep our communities safe as firefighters and police officers, staff our hospitals, build our cities, and pay taxes. Denying gay couples the right to legally marry takes away legal rights in pensions, health insurance, hospital visitations, and inheritance that other long-term committed couples enjoy. We should end this discrimination.

• Today we look back, almost disbelieving, on the time when many Americans did not tolerate marriage between Catholics and Protestants, between whites and blacks. Unfortunately, our laws continue to deny a basic right to marry to two adults simply because they are gay or lesbian.

Talking points on marriage equality

1. Frame the debate as “denying the right to marry” and “discrimination.” Avoid talking about “recognizing,” “allowing” or “supporting” gay marriage. These terms suggest to voters an approval of gay behavior, which is a larger leap for many voters than no longer denying rights or doing away with discrimination. The frame of not “denying” rights is easier to agree with because these voters can still disapprove of the behavior personally but argue that gay individuals should not be discriminated against and that gay couples in life-long committed relationships should not be denied the right to marry.

2. Talk about marriage as commitment, sharing, loving relationships, and a personal choice that should not be denied to couples just because they are the same sex. Avoid terms such as “gay marriage,” “same-sex marriage,” “civil marriage,” or others because they only serve to set gay couples apart as different and do more harm than good for long-term communications. Instead talk about not denying the right to marry to two people of the same sex.

3. Remind the public that gay Americans are American citizens who pay taxes and protect our communities as fire fighters, police officers, and by serving in the military, and therefore desire the same rights and protections as other Americans.

4. Illustrate the harm of denying these rights – lack of legal rights – hospital visitation, inheritance rights, etc.

5. Without attacking the tradition of marriage directly, remind people that there comes a time when our country breaks with traditions that wrongly discriminate against individuals. For example, today we look back almost disbelieving on the time when many Americans did not tolerate marriage between Catholics and Protestants, or between Blacks and Whites. Unfortunately, our laws continue to deny the right to marry to adults just because they are gay or lesbian.

6. Never say lifestyle as this implies orientation is a choice.Questions & Answers

Question and Answer.

Q. Hasn’t marriage been traditionally defined as between a man and a woman?

A. Marriage is about commitment, love, sharing, and compromise. It is a private, personal choice that should not be denied to couples just because they are the same sex.

Not long ago it was a tradition in America that women were not allowed to vote and that Blacks had to sit in the back of the bus. There came a time when America decided these traditions needed to be fixed to end discrimination.

Q. What about religious groups who believe homosexuality is wrong – won’t this pressure them to recognize homosexual couples?

A. No. We are not asking people to change their religious beliefs. There are many things about modern society that religious organizations disagree with, such as divorce and birth control that are now legal in this country.

Q. What about those people whose say their religious beliefs are threatened by gay marriage?

A. We are not asking people to change their religious beliefs. Just as we did not ask them to change their religious beliefs when we legalized divorce and legalized birth control. Ending discrimination of gays and lesbians is the same thing.

Q. The majority of Americans feel gay marriage is wrong. What do you say to them?

A. American attitudes toward marriage are complex. Americans’ attitudes toward the rights of gays and lesbians are evolving just as attitudes on civil rights of other groups of Americans have evolved over time. We do know from the polling data that Americans oppose discrimination of gays and lesbians.

Marriage is about commitment, love, sharing, and compromise. It is a private, personal choice that should not be denied to couples just because they are the same sex.

Q. Won’t marriage persuade young people to be gay?

A. Being gay is not a matter of choice -- it is something you are born with. People cannot be persuaded to be gay or straight. It is just part of who they are.

Q. What about the impact on children?

A. Allowing two people who are in a loving and committed long-term relationship to have legal protections will have a positive impact on the children they parent, adopt and care for, and for other children in their communities.